Cannabis ‘pioneer’ says they were left out of legal market

A person who says they are a pioneer in the cannabis industry also says they have been excluded from the legal market by the government.

Gordy Smarmy, who, with his life partner, Jimmy Steeze, runs the Bongs, Bath, and Beyond bong shop in downtown Ottawa, says he has been selling weed for twenty years but no one in the government ever asked him to take part in legalization.

“I’m basically the reason cannabis is now legal,” says Smarmy, “so where’s my legal store? I’ve smoked pot for 30 years—since I was a teenager. I’ve been selling it almost as long. I know all about the healing properties of cannabis. It cures cancer!. So why hasn’t anyone given me a licence to sell legally.”

Smarmy says he and his partner have been waiting for several months for someone from their city or province to contact them about how marijuana works and to get their expert opinion of what legalization should look like.

But nothing ever came.

“We know weed. We know bongs. Everyone knows this. Why haven’t they let us take part in the industry we literally created? It’s disgusting. I’ll never vote Liberal again!”

A contact at the city of Ottawa says they have no record of any application from the business, but the province is indeed open to private retail applications. But Steeze, Smarmy’s partner, says they aren’t going to be fooled by government traps like applications where they can collect your DNA.

“I’m not putting my name on some piece of paper the government can use to clone me by collecting my DNA,” says Steeze.”That’s how they get ya!”

Smarmy says having to fill out applications represents an overbroad and undue barrier to entry.

“We are entitled to this because we ARE cannabis. Just let us do what we want without any rules whatsoever, that is true legalization!”

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