Canadian stoners spend day after Thanksgiving recovering from prohibitionist relatives

Canadian cannabis connoisseurs, affectionately known as ‘stoners’, are spending the day after the long Thanksgiving weekend to unwind and commiserate with other stoners about all the stupid cannabis-related conversations they had to endure over the annual holiday meal with relatives.

Known as Green Tuesday, the day after Thanksgiving is always a time when fans of the wacky tobaccy get together in basements and/or post on social media about all the stupid shit they had to listen to from relatives discussing marijuana.

This year was expected to be especially bad with legalization less than two weeks away, but no one could have predicted just how bad.

“Ugh”, posted one weed enthusiast on their twitter account. “Another Thanksgiving listening to my mom’s cop boyfriend tell me marijuana is causing the collapse of western civilization.”

“Me too!” replied one of their followers. “My grandpa made everyone at the table swear an oath to never try ‘the marijuanas’.”

“I had to listen to my great aunt tell us about a nice neighbour’s grandson who tried marijuana once and then joined ISIS,” chimed in another.

And the headaches don’t end at only the negative comments, some say.

“Look, they are well-meaning and I want to help, but if I have to explain to one more grandparent what CBD is, I might lose my mind,” wrote one LP employee on their Facebook page.

This year’s Thanksgiving was expected to be especially challenging in the run-up to October 17, but Christmas is still an unknown, say some holiday analysts.

“It really could go two main directions,” says Jack Jackson with the Holiday Analysis Group. “Either everyone will be stoned AF and nice and mellow and happy, or it will be like Thanksgiving all over again with all your older relatives asking you about ‘the Seaby Deez’ or that one cop neighbour looking at your irises for too long.”

Stoners seeking community support are encouraged to go on long rants on their snapchat, Instagram live, or twitter. Or, if they’re over 40, their Facebook page.

* Feel free to use verp articles to illustrate the finer nuances. 

Leave a Reply